'07-08 Dump pt 2

More oldies...

"Broken Bones and Pinky Promises"

a sharp pain ripples through
like a fist squeezing my insides
so this is life without you
so this is life without you

I won't ask you to come back
I know it can't be done
is wanting you here with me
really so wrong?

this is not the end
I can feel it, I can feel it
more than just a friend
you can feel it, you can feel it

spiders made my heart their home
dark, damp holes attract them
I'm growing accustomed to being alone
the bright light distracts them

flood this basement with your love
or with whatever is lying around
my love is just waiting to erupt from underground
we'll be okay, love
we'll be okay


"Chronicles"

sand paper fingers clutch my throat
I claw at them for they are so cold
flesh tears, a scream stirs blood
but it came from inside the mirror
eyes wide, what have I done?
a whisper in my ear, "trial and error"
please stay at arms length
lean in for a kiss
I crumble under the weight
it bubbles the surface, temporary bliss
fleeting means it leaves
just as fast as it came
to the edge of the trees
the shadows hide my name
leave me! the command fills my throat
I hold on tight, too afraid to let go
fist spreads, invisible flailing
I wrench, morals I am purging
tell me I'm finished
that I'm wrong and need to meet my end
I'm a wretch, say it, spit in my face
but you won't, you keep me in my place
don't..
please don't...


"Tailors Make Great Secret Keepers [but mine knew too much]"

caulk my pores so nothing can penetrate
I'm made for light, but I fear I'm too late
these lies have corrupted my mind
too broken to protect what's inside
patch the ripped seams
don't you know what this means?
pull the thread through the eye...

reinforce these walls
whisper in your still small voice
tell me I'll make it out alive
reinforce these walls
whisper in your still small voice
promise me this time I'll survive

traitor! traitor!
I'm a mutineer with venom dripping from my fangs
chain me! chain me!
hold me down and suck the poison from these veins
the end is drawing near
there is nothing left to fear

that liquid you use burns my skin
but it's used to clean the stains within
my flesh bubbles, I bight to numb the pain
now I'm clean, I'm clean again


more soon...

'07-08 Dump

I've been working on cleaning out a lot of crap in my room and I came across several notebooks full of old songs I wrote a few years ago. I laughed at a lot of them, because I was still kind of a beginner... and I was VERY emo. But I thought I'd share my favorites with you :D
[I don't know the dates for these... so don't ask.]

"When Forever Begins"

one day when this sunset falls
behind the mountains
I'll hear a familiar call
a voice I've never heard
but my heart will jump at the first word
its pace quickens, in excitement, or fear?
I know it'll be better when you are near
one day,
when my eyes catch a glimpse of
the only one I've ever truly loved
when our heart beats match
beating against one another
that will be our answer
we were made for each other
with strong arms
that will never let me fall
and screaming eyes
that will conquer them all
I'll stand by your side
our fingers entwined
while our hopes and dreams
light up the night sky
but what can I give you?
I need to make you see
the only thing I have to offer
is me..


"Carnival of Blood"

tell me this is just a dream
tell me the pain will cease
tell me that isn't me screaming
just don't tell me I'm not alone
"if looks could kill"
that's what always comes to mind
to most it's only a metaphor
but when we talk, it kills me inside
try to keep above the waves
your lungs burn for one more breath
I push your head down with my bare hands
but you're dragging me along into the depths
this cage isn't so bad
at least I'm being fed
your bones ache, talk of the life you might've had
at least you'll get to relax when I'm dead
just let me apologize
it's all I know how to do
I know it won't change anything, not in your eyes
but there's nothing else for me to say
I know you mean well
using my heart as your shield
but I can't help but feel you're right
and this time, you won't be able to heal
I'm sorry, I'm sorry
can you hear me? I feel so small
I've failed you again, but this time it cost me it all


"Strike Three, I'm Out"

your cold shoulder is a slap across my face
I try to return the favor, but you return unscathed
for so long we've been setting fire to this bridge
do either of us know what love truly is?
I'm so tired of the silent battle we fight
day after day, the red is clouding my sight
it's been wearing me thing, but you seem just fine
does the pain reach your heart like it penetrates mine?
before my body goes limp, there's one thing I'd like to know
but this time I want truth, straight from your soul
did you mean any of it? the looks, the lines, the warm embrace?
why do you cringe at the very thought of my face?
know what I think? I think you're afraid
you're afraid to find that you've made a big mistake
there's more to me, you failed to see before
but I've moved on, and locked the door
I've given away the key, unfortunately for you
to someone who has become the glue
to mend the pieces of my broken heart
and create a whole new work of art
it will never shatter, it's in His hands now
I've learned to trust again, somehow
I'm sorry you don't feel you need me, maybe you're right
but we both seem to be losing this pointless fight
if you disappeared, would I feel your spirit leave?
I think this all is more than what we think we believe
I think we're both scared, terrified of being right
refusing to understand the haze is suffocating the light
our vision narrows and the dark closes in
the poison mixes with the sweat oozing from our skin
if I open my mouth, would you hear the words I mutter?
should we stay as we are, backing away from each other
until all traces of those memories fade to scars we can't see?
still think I'm invincible? neither does he..


more soon....

Nothing But Love Here

“Nothing But”

I rise from the ashes that make this bed
Nothing but soil here, nothing but embers
I’m a prisoner held inside my own head
Nothing here but everything I can’t remember
My only source of light a flickering candle
This forest too dense to let the sun through
The darkness inside me is more than I can handle
Nothing to lead me, no way to find you
I have no warmth, no covering for this body
And the winters are so very cold here
My small feet are swollen and muddy
The only company to comfort me is my fear
No one will find me here, its better that way
I wouldn’t want you condemned to this hell
I know my scars would frighten you away
But I know I love you more than I can tell
A strong hand reached through the thorns
And thrust me into blinding light
Claiming you found what you’ve searched for
Like waking up from a pitch black night
You kiss my eyelids and restore my vision
Nothing but warmth here, nothing but sun
Behind me only fading memories of my prison
No longer will I ever have to run
But oh how I will run right for you
To nothing but your arms spread wide for me
With all I’ve learned, only one thing is true
You are my light, the very air I breathe
Nothing but love here, nothing but love
In this moment, I know what I am is enough
Nothing but love here, nothing but love
Everything you are, my dear, is more than enough

~RileyVelvet